SUBMIT A LETTER

Here is where you can copy and paste any letters you have written to heal and are ready to share.

Please do not share any personal information.

DEAR DAD
DEAR MOM

DEAR DAD

DEAR DAD,

I forgive you.

I forgive you for not knowing any better.

I forgive you for not knowing HOW to love our family, because you never had a loving father in yours.

I understand growth/breaking cycles is uncomfortable. I understand it is hard to change your living to be different from what you’re used to, or what you were taught. I understand growing up in the church/school did its toll on you.

I just hope one day you will be able to forgive yourself — forgive yourself for not always having enough money, forgive yourself for spending so much tie away and alone, because you didn’t know how to be a father.

I forgive you for taking your anger out on us physically, because you weren’t taught how to handle your feelings.

I am not making excuses for you, I am just letting this go for ME.

I need you to know that I am breaking cycles and doing the hard things for MY son so he knows a parents’ love differently than I did.

I FORGIVE YOU

I forgive you for being drunk most of my life.

I forgive you for putting my life, my brother’s life, my mom’s life, and your own life in danger.

I forgive you for not getting help.

I forgive you for not being brave enough to grow. I forgive you for being selfish .

I forgive you for calling me fat. I know I am beautiful and was never FAT. I was only malnourished because of the shit food we always had available.

I forgive you for leaving.

I forgive you for going to have a life AFTER your divorce.

I forgive you for not showing up the HAND-FULLS of times you didn’t, when you said you would be there.

I forgive you for you lack of parenting skills.

I forgive you for not always calling me on my birthday, even if I am your first child.

I forgive you for being closed-minded, racist, and an egotistical, insecure man.

THANK YOU

Thank you for giving me life.

Thank you for saving my brother’s life.

Thank you for helping me move into my dorm.

Thank you for being with Mom when I couldn’t.

Thank you for trying with Jonathan.

I forgive you for being a liar, and a drug addict.

I forgive you for spending more time with Chrystal because she had drugs.

I FORGIVE YOU.

Thank you for showing me the kind of parent I wanted to be.

I forgive you for going to jail on my birthday because you were driving drunk.

I forgive you for valuing your belongings more than your children.

I’m still sad, but I forgive you.

Thank you for all of your shortcomings because now I know how to fly.

I’ve learned so much trying to “get over this”, and it sucks that my son only HEARS about my dad, and has no relationship with him.

I won’t apologize for not answering when you call or not making my way to find you.

I forgive you for letting me find myself.

– Heather Holland

DEAR MOM

Dear mom,
I can’t help but feel angry with you.
As a mom, I always think why didn’t you protect me?
Why didn’t you try to be closer to me?
Help me? Show me you love me? Cared for me? Accepted me?

Is it because I remind you of him? We’re you tired when you had me? Did you not want me? Is it that you hate me? Do you see you in me? Are we more alike than I would never wish for? Or is it because I had to be so much more stronger than you?

All I wanted was support..love..a hug. Protection. Affection. Guidance. Sympathy. Help.

All I feel is anger towards you. About you. The thought of you.
You still speak to the person who changed me. Who hurt me. It’s as if you don’t even care. Or, do you choose to just ignore what happened because it’s easier for you.

I had to let you go.
You will always be my mother, but how you treat me I do not need to accept it. You will not change, and I accept that now. But I don’t have to stay because it’s easier for you.

Good bye mother,
I refuse to let you hurt me any longer.